So much for that thingum you put on your thingie for safe sex

One of these days, Rick Santorum may discover that it's actually wackjob policy statements like this that have been responsible for the dislike that's generated the connection between certain unpleasant euphemisms and his surname and not his supposed High Moral Standing among us supposedly resentful peons, but somehow I doubt it.

Your worshipful followers don't await

Shorter Eric Cantor: "If they're not ringers of mine I want nothing to do with them."

Meanwhile, what to do about all those poor people? Crazy Pizza Guy thinks they should work - and furthermore, get paid - like the Chinese.

Credit where credit is...uh...

No offense, but helping to put a murderous scumbag in the meat locker where he truly belongs would seem to be reason for a certain degree of bipartisan praise, which is probably why Jon Stewart is a bit aghast that Obama doesn't seem to be getting any of it. And wasn't there some other deserving recipient of a similar fate recently?

As for Iraq...ah, never mind.